Journal Excerpts

The other night I went to a RS conference at which Claudia Bushman spoke. She really motivated me to keep some sort of journal! Someday I may not remember anything, and it would be nice to be reminded what happened in my life. She focused on recording the truth, no matter how un-pretty. But I want to record plenty of the pretty things too. So, here are some excerpts from the journal I've kept over the last week or two.

...

One thing Claudia Bushman said in her talk last week was something like, “Journaling is a zero-level activity. No matter what you do, it’s better than nothing.” I got to thinking, I worry about not being good enough at music, or writing, or mothering…but maybe all those things are zero-level activities too. Anything I do, any effort I make, is better than nothing; it puts something positive and creative into the world that wasn’t there before. So why not make the effort? Even mothering, which is the hardest…I may not decide to have tons of children, because I don’t think I’d be good at it, but I can do my best with the two I’ve got, right? Of course right.

...

Today we went to a Faded Paper Figures concert at a club called The Mint in LA. We took the kids…it was a short afternoon concert, very family-friendly. The music was a little loud for the kids (Cookie-Nut wouldn’t wear her earplugs), but we all had a blast! The kids danced with their friends the Romney boys and PDaniel and I sang along. It helped that we all knew the music from listening to both albums in the car. The band members (whom I can take credit for introducing to each other) are our friends John Williams and Kael and Heather Alden, who used to be our ward. And now I can actually say that we went to a smoky little club in LA. I admit the whole atmosphere appeals to me. Much better than the overcrowded Dave Matthews Band concert Pete and I went to in AZ. Much more “atmosphere.”

...

PDaniel and I tried for a while to stop watching TV at night so we could do more productive things, but apparently it’s how we reconnect. When we stopped we got kind of depressed.

...

I had a much-needed “day off” yesterday. Now that C-Nut doesn’t take naps any more (and hasn’t for months and months) I really have no alone time. I really need it—it definitely helps me be more sociable when I AM around people. It’s funny—I didn’t want to be an English major because I missed people too much and hated being alone all the time, reading and writing. Piano accompanying was a nice balance, because I had alone time to practice, but the rest of the work was with other people. And music departments can be really nice, supportive communities (like ASU was) so that was great too. Now I am constantly around people—mostly my family, mostly kids—and ache for time alone. And my poor husband is alone all day and aches for together time! So in order for me to be happier together…I need to get away sometimes.

...

So, while PDan took Dangerboy and C-Nut to a primary activity and (when they got home), played with non-Newtonian fluids, I worked on my stories; exercised; tried a new Ramen restaurant for lunch and finished the book Michael K; hit a sale at JCPenney and got a new Easter Dress for Clara (black with white flowers and green trim) and some new sneakers for Caleb. Then we had a nice family evening, ate biscuits and gravy and smoothies, watched some Scooby-Doo; and after the kids went to bed, we watched the Firefly movie Serenity. A good day.